Sunday, December 26, 2010

My Sunday Testimony

I wrote this testimony to be read at Richfield Church of the Nazarene's December 26th Sunday service. It was a very special day because it had been my only visit in four years, and most likely my last. Swartz Ambulance Service volunteered to transport me for free, making it a real miracle. I sat in the sanctuary after the service when the lights went dark. Jesus was there. I felt His surge of power and saw the beauty of the large illuminated cross behind the alter. Tears came to my eyes, because there is nothing on this earth that could ever be more powerful than that moment.


The last time I was here in church, I had no idea what would come to pass the following week. I was feeling sick, so I stayed home. Hours later, I was passing out. Waking up after that operation that saved my life, I fell into quite the depression. I couldn't move, and found out I would never regain the strength I had lost. Months, almost a year went by and I had to accept that I would be confined to a bed. I would not be able to attend church, or travel anywhere. People tell me they would not be able to handle what I have gone through. For awhile there, I did not handle it well. I made an effort to look strong on the outside, but inside, I was craving a deeper purpose in life beyond just surviving. On the recommendation of a few people, I started this blog. By inspiring and reaching out to others about Jesus Christ, I found a newfound strength to keep going. That I was finally making a difference.

Why does God allow so much suffering? It's a topic that isn't easy to explain. There are times when I just have to ask, "Why?" Not everything is made known to us. We don't know God's master plan, We wouldn't even be able to comprehend it.

God does not wish us ill, He does not enjoy seeing us in pain, or dealing with hardship in our lives. Satan is the one to blame for that. God has complete control over everything, that is true. God may step back and allow Satan to throw his stones, but God does not supply the slingshot. He knows how much we can handle, and how much we can't. God knows us deep down more than we know ourselves.

When I think back to the time where my existence was on the drawing board, I think of this. God knew I would love Him heart, mind, and soul. He was so sure, He said to Satan, "Okay, give him Muscular Dystrophy. You may have control of his body, but I will always have his soul." Satan took the challenge, and I can say with absolute certainty that he failed miserably. I will admit there were times when Satan was probably feeling pretty good about himself, but once the Lord was in my corner, he never stood a chance.

Considering all the hardships that come with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, I do not believe it is a curse. In many ways, it has made me stronger. I would not be who I am without this condition. God knows it hasn't been easy for me, but I know this life is not my last. Knowing that is what gets me through, what keeps me going. My biggest hope is that my condition will show others how faith in God can help them overcome the toughest of battles they may face in life.
I am very thankful of all the special people in my life, and those who have made this church visit possible. This may be my last chance to attend, and I'm very grateful for the opportunity.

Monday, December 13, 2010

What Keeps Me Going

One of the most asked questions asked by non believers is, If God is so loving, why does He allow so much suffering? It's a topic that isn't easy to teach. Even Christians wonder from time to time, I know I have. There are times when I just have to ask, "Why?" Not everything is made known to us. We don't know God's master plan. Even if He came down and told us, we wouldn't even be able to comprehend the magnitude of His plan.

God does not wish us ill, He does not enjoy seeing us in pain, or dealing with hardship until we break. You will need to look down if you want to see who is responsible for that. God has complete control over everything, that is true. God may step back and allow Satan to throw his stones, but do not think for one second that God supplies the slingshot. He knows how much we can handle, and how much we can't. God knows us deep down better than we know ourselves. After all, He did create every one of us.

When I think back to the time when my existence was on the drawing board, I think of this. God knew I would love Him heart, mind, and soul. He was so sure, He said to Satan, "Okay, give him Muscular Dystrophy. You may have control of his body, but I will always have his soul." Satan took the challenge, and I can say with absolute certainty he failed miserably. I will admit there were times when Satan was probably feeling pretty good about himself, but once the Lord was in my corner, he never stood a chance.

Considering all the hardships that come with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, I do not believe it is a curse. In many ways, it has made me stronger. I would not be who I am without having this disease. God knows it hasn't been easy for me, but I know this life is not my last. Knowing that is what gets me through, what keeps me going.